This & That...

Georgia is growing up! I spent the day with baby G & her momma today, learning about farriers. And barn floors. And taking naps with a baby on you when its 95 degrees. Well, actually, Georgia napped, and I attempted. When I got my eyes closed, the horse kicked the stall door and nearly gave me a heart attack. G was a trooper though, she slept through the grinder (mostly..only startled a few times) and didnt let the heat sour her mood. Cutest baby!

John has a recheck analysis tomorrow at 12:50 so please keep us in your prayers for resolution. Our new insurance isn't going to cover much, if anything, so we are looking at $2500 per month for an IUI and about $20,000 for IVF. Cost is daunting and we can't be sure how much we will be able to pursue.

Papaw's CT scan came back with less than ideal results. Turns out, the cancer is growing. It hasnt grown as much or as fast as it was previously, but its growing. I am also learning that he is vomiting several times a week. He jokingly explained it away as salmonella eggs, but I imagine that vomiting when you have cancer on the organ that touches your stomach is probably less than ideal. It is so sad to me, Im mostly blocking it out.

The kids are almost finished with school, so they'll be coming to stay with us for a week or so. I am so very excited! They were so much fun to have around :)

Hope everyone is well!

my handsome boys..

My nerves are in a bundle (get it, bundle of nerves? haha)

So, it occurred to me that we are supposed to start the process again in about 2 weeks! That makes me extremely nervous! I want this to work SO badly. AND it seems that every time I find someone to have some common ground wth regarding the fertility stuff, they find out they are pregnant. Maybe I should post an ad. "I want to be YOUR common ground friend" and then I too will get pregnant. lol. Think that will work? Yeah, probably not. John's theory is that if he buys a mustang I'll get pregnant. Yeah, probably not. He just really wants a mustang. What he doesnt realize is that if he buys a stupid car, he'll spend all his time working on it and then I for SURE wont get pregnant, because its somewhat required for me to be in the same place at the same time for atleast 5 minutes a day lol. He'll rig up some sort of under car contraption for me, no doubt. Great mental image.

I did find donor lists online. Who knew you could shop for donors by hair color, eye color, height, weight and interests. One did stand out to me. Im sure people are clamoring to use the swimmers of the 6' tall man that is interested in cooking, reading, drinking wine, and shopping. Thats every womans dream! Except those types are usually some man's dream as well :) This offers them the opportunity to use rare sperm.

At any rate, I was just foolin around cause John doesnt want to go that route quite yet. Maybe never, but Im sure he wouldnt be that cruel if it came down to it. Plus, Im not sure I could NOT do it, if that was the last opportunity.

On other news, my papaw had his CT scan done last monday, and we're still waiting to hear the results. They were checking to see if hardening of the liver still existed. They will also be able to tell where the cancer is now. He's been using holistic treatment for the cancer, using a salve to draw out tumors. It appears to be working - something comes out. I am so nervous to find out, but cant wait to see what it shows. I am so worried about him. Its hard when one of your favorite people in the whole world is stricken with cancer. Its even harder when that person is strong, healthy, vibrant, funny, and very much alive.

I dont think I actually have anything super positive to tell. Weight watchers is going... I lost 1.8 the first week, then due to my silliness in eating bbq, I gained 0.8 the next. Now, Im skipping weighing in for this week because I want to have a week of the gym under my belt first. (Oh yeah, Im joining the gym tomorrow). Thats about all I have. k. Thanks. Peace out.

Turns out...

I can be nice again :) lol. Im off this Saturday. I was originally intending to go to Ohio for a concert, but Ive decided that instead, Im going to spend the weekend here at home, spending time with my hubby. We're going boating (supposedly) and to a race (supposedly), and to dinner (maybe), and who knows what else. I do plan to assist my parents in their verizon join up. Im so proud :) John and I have had verizon for 10 years, and my parents have had..well..every other phone company. Im very excited that they are finally coming over to the dark side. I think they'll be pleased :)

25 days a month

25 days a month, I can giggle and be happy.
25 days a month, I can laugh and pretend.
25 days a month, I can ignore the fact that I have been unable to concieve.
25 days a month, I enjoy the people around me.
25 days a month, I can be hopeful.
25 days a month, I can say all the right things.
25 days a month, I can focus and be successful.

5 days a month, I am sad.
5 days a month, I am reminded of my failure.
5 days a month, I wish things were different.
5 days a month, I want to go away.
5 days a month, I am a bitch.

I joined weight watchers -

Update: I lost 1.6lbs. Not alot, but its a start, I suppose. John was very supportive.. NOT.. lol. Poor guy.

Im one week in. I spent day #1 of weight watchers eating seafood (really, though, i joined at 5:30, the day was already a waste). So, im curious to see how well i did this week. Ill update when I weigh in (weigh in is at...yep, you guessed it, 5:30...). Til then :)

A what about me sorta post

When you read this, if you want to do the same thing on YOUR blog, go right ahead :) People love to know more about you...atleast thats what I hear.


What experience has shaped you most and why?
I cant say that one experience, in particular, has shaped me the most. I think it has been cumulative. Things that stand out to me are 1)choosing to get married at a young age 2)choosing to move across the country, 1500 miles from friends and family 3)choosing to thrive. I taught myself how to sell, how to bargain, how to budget, how to earn income, how to stretch a paycheck, how to make new friends, and how to fit in. And, in typing this, I realize that probably the one experience that has shaped me the most was moving to colorado. All of things that I am proud of in myself, or things that I am proud of John for, would probably have remained unrealized had we not moved. Mostly, this caused John & I to grow up. You certainly learn how to become entertaining to your spouse when there isnt another familiar face for 1500 miles. We also learned every shelf in Walmart. And shopped in the middle of the night, but thats another story :)


If you had a whole day with no commitments, what would you do?
I would probably sleep. I dont do well with no commitments and I need atleast SOMETHING to get me stimulated and moving from day to day. My animals serve that purpose most of the time.


What food or drink could you never give up?
Mexican Food and Diet Sunkist - believe it or not, I actually prefer the diet. Its tastier, in my opinion. And Mexican food is my soul.


If you could travel anywhere, where would it be and why?
That changes with my mood. I would love to see Ireland. I dont know why - except there are bound to be hot red headed men. I want to see Hawaii. But I dont really enjoy the beach all that much, so again, im not sure why? The place that I am most often drawn too would have to be the Everglades. I have good childhood memories of the everglades, and as an adult, I have enjoyed my times there. Does that make me lame? Nope, it makes me afraid of planes. LOL


Who do you have a crush on?
Nobody. I am married. LOL Just kidding. I admire men, in general. That should keep you stepping, eh John?


If you were leader of your country, what would you do?
Shut down the borders, create an application for entry and make birth control mandatory for people on welfare.

Give me one savory recipe that doesn’t include cheese.
Cream chicken. Chicken breast with sour cream/cream of chicken soup mixture. Delicious. I'll make it for you sometime, just give me warning before you show up :)


What did you think you were going to be when you grew up?
As a child, I wanted to be a veterinarian. Then, I met a few veterinarians, and learned about being a veterinary technician. Realizing that Im not that interested in 100 years of school, obligations after hours, losing sleep for fear of your decision being the wrong one, I took the easy way out. I became a veterinary technician, and Im damn good at my job. I enjoy it, im passionate, and Ive been doing it for 10 years now. My brain is still as stimulated, and I definitely still see new things on a daily basis.

If you could spend just one day in someone else’s body, who would it be?
Someone thin.


Which woman writer, living or dead, do you admire most?
I dont remember writers names.

What character trait inspires you the most?
I enjoy funny people. Someone who can make me laugh and who can take a joke is key. Its something that I admire in my husband alot, but its easy to lose sight of that when life gets in the way. 9 years later, he still cracks me up, and its nice to know that he can provide me with a genuine laugh.

What is your favorite kind of music?
Country, hands down. I was recently scolded for not knowing who Def Leppard was (is that even SPELLED correctly?). I knew the name but couldnt list a single song. Ooops. But I know who Waylon Jennings is. Does that count?

I think I’m supposed to make up my own question for the end, but I just don’t have the brain power to do that. Feel free to consider yourself tagged though. If you are as desperate for blogging material as I am, this will make your day. It did mine.

What is one fact about you that most people who know you wouldn’t guess?
I spent alot of time being depressed. Sad, lonely, asleep. When im down, nothing is more entertaining than a nap. But, I laugh alot and cover that up.


If money were no object, what's one thing you don't own now or can't afford to do that you'd like to have or do?
If I could own anything, Id say land. I would buy gobs and gobs of land. Literally, gobs. I would make myself the most gorgeous house, with wrap around porch, a swimming pool, and gobs of land. Get it? Gobs.

According to the blog I stole this from, Im supposed to create my own question. I am drawing a blank, so I'll put this to you. What is one question you might want to ask me? Go ahead and ask :)